Learning…

I can’t say, for all my natural curiosity, that I always like learning new things. In fact, I might even say that I DON’T like being new to something that I really want to do well. Today I found myself at a yoga class that was different then anything I’ve ever done before. I was corrected repeatedly. For two straight hours. I couldn’t even fold a blanket correctly. At one point the whole class was trying to help. I think I went through every emotion listed in my book about breathing through feelings, and then some. Oh man. Blogging, setting up a website, navigating a new location, figuring out how to do life somewhere not my home, whew! Humbling and humiliating are not my ususal go to’s but I have stumbled through, and expect to continue to experience more of the same. I don’t love that nobody knows me. I mean, I can do yoga. I can do a lot of stuff actually, but that doesnt matter in the face of all that I dont know and can’t do.

What I need, is to stay open, keep my sence of humor, and relax into that ‘beginners mind’ you always hear about. Plus, I know I need to be extra nice to myself, breathe some kindness, understanding and extra patience in. Have a cool beverage, a good meal, some fun experiences here and there.

I need to stay on top of my inner regulation. Be vigilant.

I cant help thinking of all the kids back at school, learning new things every day, some against their will. Its hard to learn. Its good to. In the end it feels better to learn than not to, but initially, there might be some dysregulation for some kids. I salute all the teachers out there making classrooms safe, happy places for kiddos to learn new things. Some of us students look a little hopeless (blanket folding and all), but with time, we will get it. I remember learning to read late. I really hadnt mastered it until probably third or fourth grade (I probably havent mentioned my stuborn side), but when I got it, when reading became a voice in my head, when it stopped feeling like disiphering code, I became a vorocious reader. I love reading to this day. I’m going to keep trying to be a patient learner. Cheers to all the patient teachers who have taught me and are teaching me and are out there teaching others!