Not all at once, but yes

What does “having it all” mean to you? Is it attainable?

I think in hindsight I ‘had it all’ at different times all through my life.

When I was a young mom, I had all the love that I could handle. By the end of some days I would be hugged out. You are never more popular then when you have toddlers and babies. Attention? I had it all! Love? My babies were like marsupials, I was adored twenty-four/seven. I had more cute profound conversation then most people ever.

Another time in my life, I had a dream studio and an active art career. I loved my home! It was a bright and beautiful space for living and creating. I still love my art from that period.

Another time, I had a teaching residency that I loved! I made up my own curriculum, and throughly enjoyed teaching art to kids.

Another time I had an intense traveling season. Went to Africa, Dubai, France, Italy, Ireland, Boston NYC etc. all in a few years.

Another time I fell head over heels in love

Another time I became a grandparent. I have had the best moments with these six amazingly grand humans.

I did cool road trips.

Once I had a solo art show in Chelsea NY.

Once I remodeled an old house, published a book, wrote another book, went on a book tour…

One time I lived in Manhattan around the corner from the theater district close to Time Square.

All these lifetimes were so full of ‘it all’ that I was truly fulfilled. I hope I appreciated my moments of having it all as they were happening, but I know there were tough days and moments just like all of life.

Some days feel off even in the middle of having it all. Some days feel amazing when things are amiss. If I’ve learned anything in this life, it’s that having everything you want doesn’t equal happiness. Happiness doesn’t come from a store. Happiness isn’t something to wait for. I don’t have to wait for perfect moments of accomplishment or achievement to feel happy. Feeling happy is a state. It can be fleeting. It can sneak up and surprise me. It can disappear in the middle of the most fullfilling times.

Luckily, happiness isn’t attached to anything and can be conjured up in a moment, in one thought. One happy idea or memory can bring a smile to my face. Luckily, because I used to put everything on hold until ‘it all’ showed up or I achieved all my goals. I may have not counted too many fun moments because my mind was too busy looking at what was lacking wanting more of it all.

So yes I believe in having it all. I believe it’s attainable in chunks and spurts. I now believe in looking for parts of it every day rather than waiting for it to happen at once.