I’m working on it, but online is challenging. I’m better face to face. Instagram messager?

My go to snack lately is cottage cheese mixed with yogurt, berries, Elizabeth brand granola, pecans, chocolate chips etc. It’s my high protein, nourishing pick me up. A lot of people don’t like cottage cheese, but luckily I do. Protien is important to me. Greek yogurt gives it a little zing. I choose full fat on both.

I have used an emersion blender to smooth out the cottage cheese before, but the texture doesn’t bother me, so I skip this extra step. I feel satiated and treated when I eat this parfait like snack. It’s a win win for me.

Where I used to think of Clif bars or cookies or chips or popcorn as my go to snack, those things never made me feel nourished. Sometimes, they left me with a stomach ache. Often, I would go back for cookie after cookie and feel more hungry and start craving more sugary carbs, which left me feeling terrible. It turned out, I had some insulin issues. My blood sugar would drop randomly and so severely I would lose brain function at times or get shaky or fatigued. ( kind of like that bonking feeling I’d get in long races). It was a weird phenomenon. I actually had to quit sugar because it was causing other problems as well. I later learned that I could balance out my protein/fat to carb ratios and be fine. I eat with the intention of feeling good now. It’s made all the difference.

It won’t surprise anyone that I have a lot of crazy ideas.

If three was ever a place to share one, it would be here, so this is mine:

I would love to be involved or in charge of a research study that would teach children concious breathing then measure and compare test scores, as well as social interaction and regulation. I would love a company like Pfizer to fund it and then seeing how undeniably helpful the results are, work to instll methods of teaching this in schools and preschools, business places, hospitals etc nation wide.

The business is to sell a curiculum that delivers the nurturing aspects of yoga without any of the stigma, as a health directive. I think it would work for physical as well as mental health. I believe it could become an accepted form of healing as well as a healthy part of any parenting and educational processes.

I think the crossover is on its way already. Just like acupuncture and chiropractic practices have worked their way into mainstream, so will concious breathing. When the average parent or teacher is looking for a solution for test anxiety, stress or dysregulation, having this as a tool will not only help the child, but will also have positive affects on the person delivering the lesson. As word of the benefits spread, more and more will want to have this breathing option in their toolkit. Ways to deliver this conscious breathing education will eventually be everywhere and even commonplace, I want to get in of the ground floor and watch as it catches on and grows exponentially.

I once had a Levi’s jean jacket that was perfectly faded and frayed. I wish I still had it today. I must have left it somewhere. I had it all through high school and most of college…

To each his own.

I personally hope that isn’t in the cards for me. I can’t wrap my head around being old and unable to move or do anything. Is it a quality of life argument or a personal preference? Plenty of people enjoy their old age and all their friends and family while sitting and being cared for. There is plenty of life in that.

I might have an issue with not being useful but even that is subject to opinion. People are useful or not useful whether they move about or not. Moving and being mentally with it, don’t really determine usefulness.

I practically had an existential crisis over this prompt. I have no desire to live to be 100. Zero. I do want to live fully right now. I do want as much quality as I can pack in. I’m learning that my idea of life quality is not everyone’s. I know my opinion of this could easily change, but for now, my thoughts are, I’d rather not get so old that I can’t add anything. So no to living very long, no to life support, DNR. when I’m done , I’m done.

I liked the different responses to this prompt.

I could approach this topic as a fix what’s broken or not working dive into my life or as some people have done, as a way to brainstorm about what things I want to just do in a different way. As in, I do many things differently than the norm, but what else is there to try some other approaches at?

I like the later. I do plenty of things ‘differently’. I was a fan of Pippi Longstocking because she embodied that. I’m always drawn to the unique and unusual, but at the same time I want things to make sense. I like when life and all its doings are efficient and simple. At least the practical things, like dishes and bed making, (and look nice , that’s important to me too).

I happen to like when things are different. I like the novel and unexpected. I may like the idea of routine, I just dont naturally fall into them. Anything I do regularly, has taken time and intent and strong focus to maintain. I dont know what I’m doing from one minute or hour to the next, some days and this doesn’t bother me. I have no grocery shopping day or laundry day, I can eat whenever. Answering questions like What is your plan ?” has been challenging at times, but I do have one, lately it has an unusual amount of flexibility built into it, because it has to.

My answer to what can be done differently is everything. Every single thing can be done in a different way. When I think about that, it makes me happy.

Probably something like: Take a breath or Just Breathe

Last time I visited my son we worked on my Beatrix butterfly breathing book. Ayla, who turned two during my visit was sitting on one of our laps the whole time as we were on our computers discussing, reformatting, fixing color etc. she and I did a little yoga in the mornings and she, without us directly teaching her picked up on the breathing.

Kids are little sponges, so we shouldn’t have been surprised, but we were. On day my son and I were editing the wording for the breathing exercise. She was across the room playing as we did the motions, her mom said look at Ayla. She was doing the motions, from across the room! Which was adorable of course, but who would think a two year old could consciously breathe?

She’s ours, so we are sure she’s advanced and of course smarter than average, so maybe it’s that, but all bragging aside, (or in front), this baby can breathe!

Wait, it gets better. While we’ve been here this time she’s has had a few moments. She was having a two year old moment of frustration at one point, trying to fit a toy together and her mom again said look at Ayla, she’s breathing, I wish I could remember to do that. Sure enough, this tiny two year old was closing her eyes and taking deep breaths! I kid you not! We saw her do a version of this a few other times.

Again, I am happily surprised by the power of concious breathing. It works to calm a frustrated two year old as well as a stressed out forty year old. All it is, is a moment of filling your lungs and emptying them while thinking about filling your lungs and emptying them. I love the simplicity of breathing while I also love it’s power. If a two year old can learn how to regulate herself while she’s in a disregulated state, what is the potential here?

Some billboards remind people to wear their seat belts, to not drink and drive, or not to text while driving. I get that breathing won’t solve complicated problems, Ive heard this and it’s true, but it’s not about solving, so much as soothing . It’s just one small thing anyone can do to help themselves through a moment. My billboard would remind us to take a concious breath. To Just breathe.

I do spend time reflecting. I enjoy watching history docs and reading people’s memoirs. I like back stories and often feel inspired by the stories of others who lived years or decades or centuries before me. I guess as I look for inspiration, I often find it in the past.

History, fashion, they do repeat themselves. Many cool trends are reinvented spins on trends from other eras. I love art from long ago. I like old movies. I love old music from many genres and years. Frank Sinatra, Janis Joplin, Tom Petty. I enjoy opera and classic literature. Art of all forms, has a rich and varied past.

At the same time, I like the concept of intentioning my personal future. I am one of those dreamer types who drive themselves (and maybe a few others) crazy with grand ideas.

I wonder why we didn’t get the option of an obvious third choice? I may struggle to focus my attention here, but this is where I spend my time. Now. The present. We all do. Whether I am reflecting or projecting I’m doing it in my now and I dearly want it to think about and give my attention to what is happening as it’s happening.

Which is comically so hard! Moments tick by quickly. Distractions keep multiplying. Life has sped up!

I wonder if I don’t have a clear answer. I guess I divide my time differently depending on the day. I aim to be present, which just means that I aim to pay attention and think and feel and be aware of what is happening now. And now and now. Luckily for me, there keeps being new chances to try for that.

While mining the past and feeling out my intentions for the future. I might as well know what I want, I might as well let that drive me. I might as well spend time thinking about all three because how else will I know?